Becoming a Skilled Rider Requires Personal Development

Horses mirror us. They sense our energy, our moods, and the patterns we carry with us. When we face challenges with our horses, it’s easy to point fingers outward: “He’s lazy,” “She’s stressed,” or “Why is it always me who gets the horses with problems?” But what if your horse’s behavior is actually an invitation for you to look inward?

We Can Only Meet Others as Deeply as We Have Met Ourselves

This also applies to our relationship with our horses. The challenges we face often have more to do with us than with the horse. Maybe it’s you who needs to find more calm, balance, or awareness. When you work on yourself, your horse will inevitably reflect those positive changes back to you.

Challenges Are Invitations to Grow

Why do you encounter the same problems again and again? It’s a hard truth, but often it’s because you haven’t responded differently or gotten to the core of the issue. If you sell one horse only to experience the same challenges with the next, you’re bypassing the problem.

For example: A rider has a burning desire to excel, but her horse rears, tenses up, and resists. She thinks the horse is “impossible,” decides to sell it, and looks for a better match. Yet shortly after, the same problems arise with the new horse. The problem isn’t the horse. The problem—and the solution—lie within the rider herself.

When we dare to approach our challenges with curiosity and reflection, we open the door to personal growth. The horse isn’t against you. It’s showing you where you have the opportunity to learn and grow. The greatest potential for development lies within the challenges you face with your horse.

Take Responsibility for Your Focus and Energy

Where does your focus go when you’re with your horse? Do you see what goes wrong—the mistakes, the difficult exercises, or everything you can’t do? Or do you choose to focus on everything that’s going well—your small victories and what you’re grateful for?

"Where your mind goes, the energy flows"

What you focus on grows. If you constantly look for faults, it will negatively affect both you and your horse. But if you start appreciating what works and the moments you share, joy will grow.

READ ALSO: We need to stop putting horses in boxes! 

Joy doesn’t arise in a distant goal out in the future—it’s found right here, right now, in the connection you already have.

Your Horse as a Mirror for Your Personal Growth

Our horses challenge us because they invite us to grow. When your horse reacts—becomes stressed, stubborn, or resistant—it’s worth asking yourself: What is it trying to show me?

• Do you need to be more calm in your energy?
• More balance and strength in your body?
• Greater patience or awareness?

Your horse isn’t a trash can for your emotions and problems. Your horse deserves you to take responsibility for your own mental and physical well-being.

When we show up in the stable with frustration, stress, or imbalance, it impacts our horses more than we realize. The joy and growth with your horse begin when you dare to look inward and take responsibility. The horse can’t “walk away” from you. It stays with you—and it deserves you to do the same for yourself.

"When We Grow Ourselves, We Grow as Riders"

Becoming a better rider isn’t just about technique and skills. It’s about becoming better at sensing, feeling, and understanding both yourself and your horse.

It’s about pausing and asking yourself the hard questions:

• How am I really feeling?
• How does this affect my horse?
• What changes am I willing to make?

Your horse gives you the opportunity to meet yourself on a deeper level than you thought possible. When you work on yourself—your energy, balance, and focus—you’ll find that working with your horse becomes easier and more harmonious.

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Imperfect Matches Are Often Perfect

We don’t meet our horses by chance. Even the relationship that feels the most imperfect can be the greatest gift. Your horse is here to help you develop exactly what you need. This requires you to be open and curious, rather than giving up and searching for “the perfect horse.”

Remember: When you face challenges with your horse, it’s an invitation to work on yourself. When you choose to take responsibility, both you and your horse will grow.

Joy Is in the Present Moment

Life with horses isn’t about being perfect. It’s not about reaching a certain goal where joy suddenly appears. It’s about the journey. It’s about every day that you share with your horse. When you start focusing on what’s going well, when you choose to be present and take responsibility for yourself, you’ll discover that the greatest changes happen—in both you and your horse.

Think about it: What is your horse showing you today?

Warm regards,
Camilla

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