If you aim to always do everything perfectly, you will never be satisfied. The desire to always be or do everything perfectly is far from as beneficial as it might seem at first glance. On the surface, the desire to be perfect, or always to be the best, may appear to be a positive trait to possess. However, both in life with horses and in general, this can be more of an obstacle to your dreams than a help in reaching them.

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It's fine to have big goals

The desire to be perfect can help you set high goals to some extent. It can also motivate you to pursue them. When you strive for perfection, it also means that you are aware of where things are not functioning optimally during training or at competitions. This can be a help in improving. The perfectionist is never satisfied and is always working to improve. On the surface, this can seem like a really good trait to have, especially if you have big dreams that you want to fulfill.

The problem is, when it's not as perfect as you want it. Which, of course, it can't be all the time. Then you will never come to appreciate what you can do and what you have already achieved. This applies not only to equestrian sports but to everything in life.

If you aim for everything to be perfect all the time, you will typically overlook all the things that actually work well. You won't notice what you are actually good at. This happens because you only focus on the mistakes that have been made, and therefore believe that everything was actually poor. Even when your coach, friends, or others tell you that you did really well – which you did – you are still convinced that they are not telling the truth, or at least not correct.

Read also: Exercises that will strengthen your horse's hindquarters

Do you reject recognition?

Do you always reject others' recognition of your performances, and refer to the mistakes that have been made instead? Then it's obvious that your desire for perfectionism has become one of your own greatest enemies. It's natural and completely fine to strive for perfection. Also, to want to do everything you can to constantly improve and do your best. But it's a huge mistake to always expect it. If you expect perfection, you must also expect to spend a lot of time and life being eternally frustrated, disappointed, and dissatisfied.

The internal demands are a vicious circle. In the long run, they will destroy your joy in the sport and inevitably lead to performance problems and burnout. Initially, it may manifest as impatience, dissatisfaction, and anger at yourself. It destroys the natural joy you should feel when you are with your horse. In sheer frustration, it can very easily end up with you training even harder, and ramping up the demands and expectations on yourself even more. All to achieve perfection next time you are training and/or at a competition.

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When the preassure to be perfect becomes too great

With all the pressure you constantly put on yourself, you can end up performing below your normal level. And this will likely trigger even more frustrations and dissatisfaction. As time goes on, you will begin to lose faith in yourself. Your self-confidence will fall, and you might start to wonder if equestrian sports and horses are really for you. Of course, they are, you've just fallen into the perfection trap.

Another negative side of perfectionism is that you become completely unable to see all the good things you have actually achieved. And appreciate how much you have learned. Nothing feels good enough because you are more focused on the mistakes you make. In this way, you lose a valuable opportunity to build your self-confidence and to utilize your full potential. You don't need to be perfect to be "good enough".

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"Let the perfectionist stay home in the future and enjoy life here and now with all of us other imperfect (horse) people."

This article is brought to you in collaboration with Pia Bjerre/Rytterfokus.dk, offering advice, coaching, courses, workshops, and lectures. All with the aim of helping you move forward and achieve exactly what you desire and are passionate about in equestrian sports. The original article can be found on Rytterfokus.dk.